MNS.

alright, i think u all will be very curious what do i mean by MNS. it's actually known as the MidNight Syndrome. everytime when i stay awake over midnight, i will have this syndrome automatically.

the syndromes are:
- homesick out of sudden
- depressed
- painful at every parts of the body
- panic attack
- hyperactive, followed by depressed episodes

well, i cnt explain much about it, it's just...errr...how to say? an usual routine. now im having my joint pain at my left middle finger. the painful was like someone penetrating a needle through my finger. ARRRGGGGHHHHH pain pain pain!

by the way, speaking of depressed, im really depressed for my paper today. err, well yesterday i mean. DAMN IT! i screwed both my statistic and biology paper. for stats, i didn't expect so many essay parts. okie, when u heard of STATISTIC, what came across ur mind? lotsa calculations and formula right? BUT, i will like to emphasize the word "BUT", this lecturer is the most eccentric person that i have ever seen in my 18 years of life. we did ESSAYS for statistic instead of calculations. i prefer calculations, coz its based on concept and understanding. however, essay parts need to memorize all those theories! and the tips he gave are not so ACCURATE my gossshhhh!! im so gonna get my FIRST C for this bloody idiot donkey subject la...oh ya, the irony part is that, english composition 2, their final paper consists of all MCQ questions. so so super irony right?

and yeah yeah, not to mention about Bio. 60 questions. too many words, i read till wanna sleep d. my eyes damn painful. and on the other hand, the questions are so tricky. the answers are so similar to each other, and all of them have likelihood to become the answer. SHIT. really shit la. victor was so confident. yet im struggling. another B or C for this subject again.

really hate this semester. my studies are going down the slope, and declining like nobody business.

im depressed, but not with the typical JoJo depressed look. im completely emotionless, or a bit hyper especially during the yamcha session just now. i think this is the highest level of my depression la. being emotionless for too depressed event. most probably, my brain's ability of controling the emotions have malfunctioned. DAMN IT!

anything la, dun bloody care d. no strength at all now. really need to go for medical check up. my whole body is like an old and "lao giak" machine, that is gonna wear off soon. ohhh, young face with an old lady's body. sounds coool huh?

lalalala...


lalalalalal...


lalalalalalalala....



depressed....




by the way, Letty's free gigantic huge large big and dono what description la, the MILK TEA from wong kok. damn big and really worth it. next time we shall go there when someone birthday again. haha...
nah, the very huge milk tea!
zoom in!

oh well, my 2.0 megapixel phone camera cannot compete with Chow Sze Wei's 5.0 megapixel phone camera la. maybe in these pictures can't really show how big it is, im waiting for other pictures to come in. the glass is bigger than my head! really!


alright, i shall go back to sleep.

stupid joints...grrrrr...

Youtube

youtube again. supposed to study as usual, but end up watching youtube.

my friend recommend this video in youtube. well, she's a big big fan of korean pop. so yeah, this video is so FUNNY that my stomach muscle ache when i laugh so hard. damn! some of them may look sissy, but no doubt they are all good looking, and really really talented in dancing! like i said, i addicted to kpop dances recently! hahaha...

enough of crap. watch this.



ENJOY.



ABNORMAL PSYCHOLOGY IS DRIVING ME ABNORMAL...

Im yours.

well, this song used to be my favorite (it is still my favorite, but recently replaced by knock u down! haha). so just now when i was surfing videos in youtube, i came across these 2 videos

usually i won't watch these videos. coz in my previous perception, i think they are just trying to show off. opps, anyway now i like it. some of them even better than the original version.

nah, 2 girls singing im yours. the first girl plays the guitar better, but i personally like the girl in second video. she's ADORABLE! especially her voice, quite unique i would say.




enjoy.



arrghh what am i doing? ain't i supposed to studie now? GOSH~

NO LIFE!!!


wow, my second post for today after a few minutes! i know i know, i damn no life! coz i keep getting myself excuse from continue typing my notes! ARRRGGGHHH!

anyway, the reason im here is because......shhhh...i found a secret!!


woahahlalalla....



i found my sister's blog accidentally. and i think she never expect me to read it, because she wrote lotsa of her secrets in there! all of her UNCENSORED thoughts! WAAAHHHH~ hahahaha

well, what do i mean by secrets?

she talked something bad about me! (as usual). said i bully her la, this la that la, i dun bloody care about this, because....IT'S TRUE! im a violent SISTER! buakakakkaa...

then she gossip about mom lo. like mom always compare her with her friends, mom always scolded her for nothing. mom always nag her when she haven started to do her project and all. she complained a lot wei! she's gonna be so DEAD if i show this post to my mom man! and she will kena beat kao kao, scolded kao kao, maybe mom will ban her from watching tv and online! *evil grin* sound nice hor? BUT, for ur information, i will not betray her! good sister!


and the most funny one, will be the post that she revealed her crush on this guy!
waah, the news is so stunning like a thunder storm strike me from above after i read it! BANG!!!! im so surprise coz my sister is different from me, she doesn't like to share things with others, neither mom nor me. so end up, she accumulated everything inside, and burst out when she really cannot take it. so, she wrote everything in her blog lo!

wow, never knew my sister will have a crush on guy lea. of coz, im not saying that she should have a crush on a girl, but how to say? i watched her since the day she was born (of coz la deh...), and all the while i still perceive her as little kid, coz she always fight with my 12 years old brother, behave like a kid. grrr...so anyway, suddenly through this post, i realize that she has grown up! she starts admiring guys, who are around her age. she starts to daydream about her future with the guy she crush on. she revealed her sorrow when she realize the guy actually court on a girl (whom is not her) for few years.

awwww...feel like crying. and laughing at the same time. because it's funny. the way she write the post is like those taiwanese drama. "i will still wait for u at the corner, waiting for u to turn and look at me someday" something like that la...goosebumps wei! i shall stop her from watching those dramas, she learnt all those nonsense things! and yeah, it actually sound like what i used to write couples of years ago! hahaha, i was YOUNG too k?

i realize that, she is having low self esteem actually. she always compare herself to me. and feel devastated as she realize that both of us will never be the same. hmmm...gotta help her, with my psychology theories and therapies and all! haha...


BUT, I WILL STILL BULLY HER NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS!!!!! LALALALA...

AWAKE!

peeps, it's 2.37am and im still awake! rushing for my abnormal psychology notes, 2 more questions to go! and thanks to the Mcd lipton tea, im so energetic now, even my eyes sore. but still cnt sleep! plus, i mengada, i got nothing to bite so i end up eating the chilli padi that my dad fried for me. it's spicy and fire burning in my stomach! woooaaahhh, the burning sensation in my stomach now is so strong, and i bet it can keep me awake for another 1 or 2 hours!

i really no motivation to studie lew. feel like escaping! running away! do other things that will not involve any of my poor brain cells. poor brain, u had worked so hard, soree and sayang~

im basically babbling on. lalala.

and also spend time wondering something. has i changed? am i so afraid to say no, and always do what people wish me to do? am i look so weak and innocent that many people can take control on me?


im no longer the miss independent.


dependent.
selfish
childish
stubborn
hot tempered!



arrrgggghhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!



stop forcing me!



why am i always in a dilemma situation? why is it so hard for me to make decision? why?!




and anyway, i've decided. will tell her asap, before i fidget and change my mind again.

empty

i feel odd recently. oh well, actually this feeling starts to strike me this morning. i was err...not to say depressed, nor euphoria. i was just, empty. dead. don feel like doing anything.

lack of motivation i suppose.
have been worked so hard
have been pushed myself towards the last tip of my energy.
but why?

this feeling, is....ODD i would say.

very weird.

like nothing can keep me excited. i mean, really excited.

im not trying to be emo or something. just that, i don feel like talking, even lose appetite towards food that i used to like. lose the enthusiastic in doing things that i used to enjoy.

why???

the emptiness occupied myself, and i cannot get rid of it!


if u ask me, what do u want actually?
all of a sudden, i become so unsure about what i want, what i was after, what i need.
my passion towards a lot of things fade away, i err...to be honest, i dono what happen to me.


i would like to stress, im not emo. not stress. stress isn't like this

i guess im just...losing some part of myself.

how i wish my brother is here to cheer me up.

HARRY POTTER!

yeah people, i went to watch HP6 with my bunch of friends today, right after our class. the movie was good, impressed me! let see as follows.

1. the sound effects were awesome! beginning there was this heart beating sound, create the suspense. then when Harry they all were having fun, the music at the back change to something comparatively more cheerful! fighting scene at the end was the climax!
   
2. young actors/actress were good! can see some improvement. especially Ron. can really see the changes of his facial expression when he was normal, poisoned and love-poisoned. haha, the face changed immediately after he drank the poison. the eyes, the nose. everything!
   
3. minor characters play important role too! Lavender Brown was so "hua chi" that i feel like slapping her in the face. Bellatrix was really good! she managed to portray the characteristic like what JK Rowling wrote in the book. loyal, sarcastic and also scary in a sense. like someone who escaped from mental hospital. urgh. play her role well enough i suppose
4. transition of scenes were great! when Dumbledore dead, Harry went after Snape, and they had a fight. there, transition from close up shot to long shot was perfect! the action can be seen clearer. and a lot more of scenes like this, impressed me!

however, there are still some snapsticks in the movie. some unneccessary/ random/ doesn't make sense scenes. like Ginny and the shoelaces, set the house on fire, random lady at the railway station and all. i dono what's the message behind these scenes, maybe they just wanted to emphasize on the following scenes? or make it more dramatic than it could be seen? i dono...

the movie is still worth to be watched, an undeniable truth. like what ivan said, the direction was good. even they cut down most of the stories in the book to make it more condense, i was still impressed.

feel like watching again. i like HP, but not those really big fan like chiausim or cheewei. (oh both start with C!) cheewei even learn the spells and all. they were so clear about the plot of the story! oh well, not me, i read once i forgot most of it! hahaha

yet, GO WATCH HP6! chuntttt~

cant wait for HP7 to come now

TADDAA~

i changed my layout again! since every shopping complex having season sales to clear the old stock, i will do the same to my blog too! nah, what i mean is, renovate the whole blog, everything is new now!!!! lalala...

hope it's not so complicated. enjoy! have fun!

Let's Have some fun, this beat is sick.
i wanna take a ride on your disco stick
- Love game -

PROM is over.

wow, my friend updated their blogs way faster than me. all regarding the prom, which was held on Friday, 10th July 2009 in Berjaya Times Square Hotel, Manhattan Ballroom II. i was the program coordinator (so call la), ran here and there with my 3inch HEELS!!!! URRRGGGHHHH do u know how torturing it is? MY GOD! those effects just attack me since last night till now. my whole body and legs pain like hell. i swear, next time, i shall wear the heels just for modelling and posing only, not running around like some auntie! issshhhh...

anyway, the PROM was a blast! it was quite successful and reach all my expectations! performances ran well. emcee (cyn im talking about u) found her humor sense after fidgetting in the beginning. the room looked elegance with the blue lights. (THANKS JOSHUA!) the receptionists and usherers looked great! (NICK, wow especially! wore contact lens wor, looked different!). the PA guy who collaborated with us congratted me after the whole thins. i guess event like this must be common for them huh?

really, i miss those days. i realize this is the common feeling after i organized every grand events and camps. i was easily irritated and stressed up throughout the preparations of prom. dealing with people, internal conflicts, losing my own happy self and all. even on the day itself, everything happened impromptu, changed agenda at the eleventh hour. almost broke down, but managed to prevent it happen. thanks to Lett, she always provided me support in many ways. also, thanks to him that night. i felt calm in his presence. everything fall into place. i was relieved. really. my prays worked out. the feedback was quite acceptable, before the MOS incident i would say haha.

i apologize for my bad temper during the prom. well, i will not get myself excused for that. because i know my temper. aiks, will work hard in managing my emotions. im so emotional my god! grrrr...

thanks to Jess, who lend chiausim and i a room before the night. and im soree i bullied ur patrick. hahaa, but i promise i wun do that again, u got the voice recorded from me right? if i managed to delete that clip, i cnt keep my promise again.

thanks to chiausim, whom worked together with me to overcome the strong JS syndrome on the night! yayyy! now we really need to think how to solve all these JS people.

thanks to all committee member especially most of the Fayette house members. we got close in the preparation. i still remembered the first time when we surveyed the hotel, Horng was like very quiet and looked stern. afraid of him that time. now? cheh, HI PRINCESS HORNG!
hahahah...

nah, enjoy the pictures, i took a few only. no time to eat, where got time to camwhore wor? sigh...

next time, as if there is a next time, i will choose to sit down and relax, without involving in anything. enjoy the time with my friends. hey, did i mention that i didn't get to sit down and eat a lot even i paid the ticket? grrrrr...UNFAIR UNFAIR UNFAIR! THE FOOD LOOKED SO APPETIZING YET I ATE ONLY A BIT!!!!!!!!!!jierrrrrrr....

and yeah, i really hate make up! it took me so many time to put it on, and also ages to remove it! URGHHHH!!!

alright, before make up.

chiausim put on her make up d that time, see my swollen eyes and big eyes bags?
our favorite washroom!

and now, after make up. be ready, Jess said i looked like those "lala-mui" in sg wang. sobbbb...
i will not do this often. ishhh...

jess wana look cool but i ignore her haha

Yion and her darling, me and mine! whee~
chiausim.
cally
rachel!

Kristy! dun worry, u look cute in this! hahaha..
can u see Lett? DEEP V DRESS lea, waaahh~~~a lot people not here, waiting for the complete pictures to come!

despite all the conflicts we have, i shall give an A for those memories. even i really pissed off and fed up, WE MADE IT HAPPEN!

gosh, now i feel really empty after all my hectic schedule. aikssss, shall do something that i should responsible for. like how to become a understanding girlfriend? hmmm learning learning...

hey JoJo, this is joe.
i behald of Dischord would like to say
Thanks for having us tonight
and i hope we managed to entertain the "promers" as how u expected.
we din get to see u becos we hav to rush to the next event.
right after the prize giving and we got there just on time.
Have a good night.
- message from the winner of audition that night-

awwwwww....im so touched!!!!!

relieve!

heyya, im in a very good mood today! lala, coz most of the preparation jobs for prom had done! and what left now is only decoration and the night itself. plus, im waiting for letty and cally to send me information for my bio report. apparently i got nothing to do now! wowwww~ AWESOME!

stats report and presentation? aiya next week only do la...

bio report? still pending, letty and cally supposed to find the information ma

prom performance? i cancel one of my performance d, so i wouldn't have to spend time to practice for the dance. so im involved in only one performance, which is only 1min plus. HOORAY!

basically the performances are secure. emcee im not so worried because of Joy. she's experienced and i believe she can guide Robin and Cynthia well!

nothing left now. i should feel happy. but a bit empty inside. why? because out of a sudden, DANG! everything is done. i got nothing to do anymore. its a good thing actually. i can sleep more and fangkong more! yayyyy!!!

another special thanks to him. whom had accompanied me throughout my stressful days. had been a hard time for him i guess? soree dear, it's gonna over now! thanks lots and miss ya!

PEOPLE LET'S BREAK A LEG!!!! WOOO HOOOOO

PROM COMING PROM COMING PROM COMING PROM COMING!

addicted!

im addicted to this song! keep playing in my head since Monday! waaaahhhh love this song! start to fall in love in Keri Hilson's voice! her voice is so special that caught my attention! listen to this!!!!

Keri Hilson ft. Ne-Yo and Kanye West - Knock You Down

btw notice the lyrics too! quite meaningful...


finally get back to home. i become the sloth again. lazy to anything! aiksss im so lazy...Mom's getting emotional, argued with dad, refused to talk to each other for the whole damn week. sigh...i dun have the energy to care about this anymore. just let me take a break from my busy week. gotta start my work later.

all the best for my prom. i really really really honestly, very worried about it.

mid term over!

yo peeps! mid term is OVER! OVER OVER OVER! walalalalalalala...i dun like exams, i hate studying for exams, i hate burning midnight oils just to cover a few chapters! issshhhh...BUT anyway, exam is over!!!!!

prom is coming, like really close. next friday. i gained weight d, dono whether still can fit the dress i bought last time? kinda worry actually. facing some crisis in handling performances. realize that maybe im not that capable in organizing event like what i think i am? well, im having difficulties to deal with my emotional instability recently. having roller coaster of emotions. sigh...poor thing. people around me havta endure my weird temper. soree people, will try to control it. do understand me please.

i really need to prioritize my job now. im treating my studies in this sem sambil lewa, meaning? do all my studies without my best. i slept in most of the classes. all my energy and time contributed to prom, and other stuffs. STUDIES! shouldn't studies and result are my first priority? this prom has turned me upside down. im no longer the same person. stupid prom. hate it hate it hate it!

i miss home. i miss dad. i miss dad home-cooked dishes. i miss mom. i miss the moment i complain evything happened to her. i miss my stupid sister. i miss all her dumbness. i miss my brother. i miss his stubbornness! argghhhhh i miss home! really miss home. i wana go home. really homesick now. JENJAROM JENJAROM JENJAROM JENJAROM JENJAROM! why are u so far away? far far away!

visit to his house really made the homesick feeling getting stronger. watched their family casual talks reminds me of my family too. i really miss them lots. bits and bits, engulfing me. the feeling of loneliness without family. OMG im such a family girl!

all the best for my coming grand event. have been talking crap all the while. guess i was depressed for my BIO result. sigh...should really study harder and harder. i have no one to blame but myself.

I...adore you
- Transformer II -